Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Gi Gi's Birthday

We love Koh Samet, it’s the closest thing to a tropical island close too Bangkok, only a three hour drive and a 15 minute speed boat trip and your there.

We stayed at Samed Villa’s http://www.samedvilla.com/ ; it’s a new set of bungalows and only £23 a night per room. As you can see from the room, the view was pretty spectacular.

It was Gi’s birthday, Gi is a good friend of Kim, and so we were lucky to get an invite for the weekend. Friday night we had a lovely meal on the beach near the Hotel, I had a late one going with the girls (In Picture) to the local Nightspot. God! I’m too old for that sort of shit. I also met one of Gi’s friends and her English boyfriend. Ian is a teacher not far from me and more importantly comes from Derby!

The following day we spent most of the day on the beach, I snorkelled, read, relaxed and as usual got sunburnt. I don’t know how I manage it, I’m always so careful for obvious reasons. Sadly it meant I was in no condition to go to the Saturday night party. Nuch and I made the most of our Elizabeth free weekend and had a quiet meal by ourselves and a walk back on the beach.

Sadly departure on Sunday soon came around and we were blessed with only a total trip back of only three hours, which was great, Nuch was missing Elizabeth and was desperate to get back. So thanks Kim for the weekend.

Sunday, January 28, 2007

Taxi ride from Hell!

On Friday we caught a taxi down to our friends Kim, we were going away with her for the weekend, it was another friends “Gi Gi’s” birthday so we where going to Koh Samet for the weekend.

We got in taxi, had a debate which way to go, he told us there was big traffic the normal way we go, so we took is advice and went the slightly longer way. Half way to the Express Way he took a U Turn, when I asked him what he was doing he said he knew a quicker way to the Express Way, although sceptical, I agreed. Bear in mind from this position we where only 5km from the Express Way, 17km later! We still hadn’t even reached the Express Way; the old twat was pulling a fast one, then the cheeky Bastard call for some petrol on my time.

By this time I was ready for lynching him, but getting a new taxi can prove difficult from where we were so we persevered and told him to put his foot down.

On the Express Way, he drove like an absolute nutter, doing nearly 100mph, doesn’t sound excessive, but the taxi was a nail. There was a huge explosion sound and the rear tyre shredded off whilst we were opposite Don Muang Airport, possibly the last place on earth you want to stop. He did know more and got out and began changing the tyre, cars and buses were pipping at him, I just wanted to get off the Express Way, also we were still on the metre!

We got going 15 minutes later and we told him to get off at the next exit, every second spent in that taxi was a second too close to death.

When he stopped we an argument about the fee, if it was left to me I’d have given him just a piece of my mind, he wanted the full fee, he didn’t get it!

I will add this episode to the drunken, falling asleep and can’t actually drive tales of Bangkok’s Taxi’s

Friday, January 26, 2007

Baby loves water

Even though our expedition to a swimming was not to successful, Elizabeth loves having her daily baths.

The water as to just the right temperature and depth, although she is getting too big for this tub, we'll have to buy another one soon.

From the bath we take her to the towel where she loves being wrapped up and talced up, it is always a lottery, seeing how long you can keep her there before she pisses on you!

Some people have expressed surprise as too me being a Father, several years ago I had the reputation of the "Child Catcher" out of "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang"! If I knew what I know now about having children I would have six of them (Or maybe not).

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Thailands Robin Hood

Thailand prides itself on its latter day Robin Hood. The brave boys in brown who gallantly stayed home during the Military Coup so as not to cause any trouble.

The only real difference between the UK Robin Hood and the Thai version; Thai Robin Hood steals and extorts off the poor to keep himself. I write this post because yet again I got stopped today on the Expressway for speeding, I usually have too pay a 500bht bribe and off I go. It’s gone up in recent months, because of the lost revenue during the coup.

The worst part is I new there was a speed trap so I was only doing 70kph, stayed behind a bus so I couldn’t even be zapped. I get to the Toll Station and get pulled. Luckily the copper had a good command of English, so when I was told I was going 110kph I was surprised, he was even more surprised when I told him I wasn’t and asked to see the data!

I have been warned not to provoke the feds, they can put you up in the Bangkok Hilton on a whim, and this time I had had enough. If the money went into the coffers of Thailand then fair enough, all this money goes in the kitty for divies later.

After he thought about and then used Elizabeth as an excuse he sent me on my way. These guys never stop the rich merc drivers, because they probably know their boss or will kick up a fuss. The poor pick up driver or scooter rider is the usual target.

Everyone in Bangkok knows this goes off but does nothing about it! Why?

Tuesday, January 23, 2007


Never before have I seen such blatent censorship as I did this morning. At the beginning of a CNN article about former Thai PM Thaksin, the above picture came on!

The clip was saying that the former PM who as been a thorn in Thailands side as been told he can come back, but cannot enter into politics, which seems fair enough. Sadly the Thai people are not being allowed too know this.

I believe the Generalissimo favourite team is Liverpool, I guess that should they start to loose a game, we will have a transmission break.

Monday, January 22, 2007

Aon does UK

Aon was one of the first people I met in Thailand, i've known her three years. Over christmas and New year she visited her Boyfriend Paul in the UK.

It was the first time she had flown and did the trip non stop on EVA Air. I asked her to tell me what she thought of the UK;

Way too cold (Even though it was 10C higher than normal)
Everyone walks too fast (The Thai's walk way too slowly)
Very expensive
£100 for a meal for four people

There were good points;

Drivers were very good
The shops were great
Everyone was very freindly

Sadly she did meet some of Thailands better known exports to the world, some Thai prostitutes in Chinatown in London.

On the whole she liked the UK, but wouldn't want to live there. I've remember thinking that a few years ago!

Sunday, January 21, 2007

The rams fly high

As I write this blog, the great Derby County Football Club are riding the top of the Championship in England!

Even though Birmingham have two games in hand and only three points behind, they've got to win both games to be on top.

All this is only Rams speak for "At least we wont get relegated this year". Who knows I may be watching on ESPN in the Premiership in August.

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Red under the Bed

These last few months i've really noticed an increase in the volume of Russain visitors to Thailand. The former USSR may have lost the Cold War, but they seem to be enjoying the peace.

Maybe now that they have a glut of oil and gas, and more importantly aren't tied up in brutal war on terror in Iraq, Afganistan and the Midle East. The enforcise seems to be on making money. Also parts of Russia are not much more than a 1000 miles away, so its like a weekend trip to Mallorca.

I had seen a few Russain hookers in higher class establishments on my first visits to Bangkok, but other than that, zero. At new year at the Ambassador Resort Hotel, I would say that it was around 90% Russain guests, walking around Pratunam you now hear russain spoke all the time and this weekend in Pattaya there were several Russain parties at breakfast.

From what I have heard, our eastern european friends are careful with the Rubel, which is good. If you go into any Japanese or Korean spots around town, you can expect to pay triple prices.

They do seem a bit hard faced however, when you greet them your'e lucky to get an acknowledgment of any sort, and were western europeans usually speak better english than me, it is difficult to spark a conversation with the average Russian.

It can only be a good thing, more people visiting Thailand.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Too Cold!!

Last weekend we went to our favourite place in thailand, the Cabbages and Condoms Resort at Pattaya. It as got everything you need in a Hotel. Top rooms, first class service and fabulous food.

We arrived just in time to catch a beautiful Pattaya sunset, always worth the trip. That evening we actually ate next door at the Elephant Cafe, run by an english guy called Chris, it serves great english and Thai food. I had my usual Fish, chips and mushy peas washed down with several pints of John Smiths.

The following morning after a great buffet breakfast which includes baked beans we headed off to the pool. I wanted to see what Elizabeth thought to the water. She hated it! Way too cold, but funny to watch.

On the way home we called in at Nuch's favourite seafood restaurant, located at the end of Jomtien Beach, you can get a couple of kilo of huge prawn for about £4.

An excellent trip, one I hope we get the chance to do it again soon.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Little Baby

I guess because Elizabeth as been with us for nearly four months, we have got used to her and forgot she is still just a little baby.

As you can see from the pictures, the jeans my Mum sent are still 6 - 8 months away from fitting her. Thai baby clothes are a little on the small side, but clothes sent to us are a little on the big side. The best fitting clothes have been the one's Elizabeth's great Auntie Paula sent from Australia, the Pumpkin Patch gear looks great.

The second picture you can see how small she is, her hand can only just fit around one of my fingers.

I want her to grow up, but at the same time its great she is a little baby!

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

No end to Health & Safety

We've been waiting ten months to get a land line. A definate downside living in a second world country!

The local junction boxes have now been put up, just the line to the house and connection to go.

As you can see from the picture, these two guys climbed up the eight meter pole, put the ladders against live electrical wires and just got on with their jobs, bear in mind the ladders are made from bamboo!

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Hollywood Stars say no to drink

Thailand’s new Anti alcohol Laws are going from the ridiculous to the down right bloody stupid.

On ESPN and Star Sports during football programs that are sponsored by Tiger Beer. Instead of the Tiger Beer advert we are treated to a parade of “Hollywood Stars”, why these people I don’t know. If the sensor wanted to keep family values by censoring beer adverts, why do they show a parade of Drug takers, alcoholics, wife barterers, strange mental cases, deviant Bozo’s from Hollywood? One as even been linked with an affair with her brother!

I’ve said before, if they want to curb alcohol consumption, put the price up! Make it a £1 a pint from the Offy, not 45p a pint. Also stop small local shops from selling to anyone at any time of the day.

Tiger Beer must be laughing, regular viewers to the footy all know, that when the celebs come on the screen its an advertisement for Tiger Beer, I know, all the Farang know and certainly the Thai’s know it. One of the biggest differences between the UK and Thailand is; Air brained schemes seem to get off the ground in Thailand…..

Monday, January 08, 2007


Today we got Elizabeth’s British Passport, she is now a full British Citizen, eligible to all the benefits a Kosovo benefit seeker would get in the UK.

Two differences in the Passport are; The Thai Passport as 50 pages and costs only £14, not £65 for the UK Passport.

She is growing so fast and seems to be as happy as Larry, even having a Father like me. She loves to laugh at me and to see her in the morning when she wakes up and recognises you is the best thing.

A big thank you to my Mum and Lisa for giving me advice on constipation and dandruff! Not for me, but for Elizabeth. Weak orange juice for the stomach and Vaseline for the head. Both remedies worked.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

First taste of the sea

On our New Year trip to the coast, we gave Elizabeth her first taste of the sea, as you can see from the picture, it was not to her liking!

“Too cold Mummy”

Laptop RIP

What I predict and what usually happens are two different things usually. I had predicted a bright start to 2007, you guessed it, everything is going pear shaped.

First Nuch’s Moby gives up the ghost so we have to buy a new one, then my Laptop memory decides to loose itself!

The money part of the equation is bad enough, but my Laptop contained the last three years of my life and it is all lost, pictures, work and diaries!!!!!

I have replaced it with a new larger memory and thankfully most of the pictures of Elizabeth we have got in one shape or another, but things like my trips to all the countries I’ve visited are gone, my i-tunes collection is gone and all my many years of work on ebay as gone up the swanny. What a pain! Anyway, no time to mope around, I’d better pull my finger out and get busy, one thing I’ve learnt is “If it doesn’t kill you, it makes you stronger”.

Monday, January 01, 2007

New Years Day 2007

On New Years Day we drove to a resort just to the south of Pattaya. The Ambassador City Resort is huge, definitely the biggest I’ve stayed in, bigger than Circus Circus in Vegas.

Sadly that is were the comparison with a great Hotel ends. There was definitely a feeling of a hangover from the night before, we tried four of the Hotels restaurants at lunch time to get a meal and in one the food looked so shit as not to bother, another was closed and the other two, after a thirty minute wait to be served we gave up and went into town and ate at Cabbages and Condoms.

The evening was a little better, with an international buffet which was quite nice. The hotel seemed full of Russian guests. Even though they looked western, there is still a cultural divide, saying hello in the lift will be met with a stony glance at best, very little chit chat among guests and no knotted handkerchief hats!

The resort had a nice beach and plenty of water sports, car parking was great and the room was also ok. We had a problem with the Aircon and the phone, once reported both problems were sorted. When the Housekeeper came to see the problem and saw we had Elizabeth, she arranged for a cot to be bought up.

Again breakfast was ok, a good buffet with a 4/10 fry up available. I might stay at the Ambassador again, maybe the day after New Years Eve isn’t the best time to judge a Hotel.